Campus CrossWalk Magazine: 2005 Summer Issue -- Peter Pan Ideology

Imagine a sixteen-year-old boy politely tipping his hat to an attractive young woman while a fifty-year-old man projects inappropriate remarks towards the same young woman.

Imagine again a sixteen-year-old boy maintaining control over his anger while a fifty-year-old man explodes over the same wrong suffered.

I can imagine these events because I have witnessed similar cases. I have often wondered why some men at fifty will act less mature than a boy at sixteen. I am not degrading teenagers or those older than myself. I am just pointing out that there is something wrong when a fifty-year-old man acts sixteen. Such men need to grow up.

I do not believe that these certain fifty-ear-old men are unaware of how to mature, nor do I believe that they refuse to mature. Rather, they seem to have not thought it very important to mature.

The apostle Paul taught that in order to become mature, we must learn to love regardless of the circumstances. Love does not rejoice in evil but in truth, love does not envy, love does not brag, love does not behave rudely, love is not selfish, love is kind, love suffers long, love ‘bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things’ (I Corinthians 13). Paul concluded by remarking that if the church grows in love, they will grow in maturity.

Since the church is the people, it is logical to presume that people mature by loving.

Every moment I live, I am either becoming a better person or a worse person. Someone might say, ‘Well I am at a standstill so I am neither bettering nor worsening.’ Now if someone were to actually make such a statement, it would appear to me that what he is actually saying is that he is content with who he is and does not wish to mature. He might think he is at a standstill, but in reality, his heart is hardening. And as his heart hardens, he loses his motivation to love. Therefore since he is losing his motivation to love, he becomes more and more unloving. He does not just remain in his immaturity but he gets worse.

A sixteen-year-old boy may be more mature than a fifty-year-old man, not because of worldly wisdom derived from numerous observations and experiences, but because the sixteen-year-old boy learned how to love and was convinced of the necessity to love. His striving towards loving makes the difference.

Thus, a sixteen-year-old boy might make a polite gesture while in a similar circumstance, a fifty-year-old man might make a rude one.

Russell Lingerfelt graduated from Auburn University and is currently pursuing a Masters in Divinity at Pepperdine University where he is involved in youth ministries and world mission efforts. Visit his webpage at http://www.jamesrussell.org .